Thursday, November 21, 2024

Jonah Hex V2 #52 "Too Mean to Die"

 Jonah Hex V2 #52 Apr '10
"Too Mean to Die"
Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti - story, Jordi Bernet - art and cover 

Night, a downpour in a swamp, possibly on the Gulf coast. Jonah Hex is bleeding and eventually comes upon a cabin with light issuing forth. As he approaches, he hears the cry of an infant and spying through the window he sees the mother put the child to her breast. He gently knocks on the door, stating he is alone and wishes nobody any harm, looking only for shelter and food. After some silence, he says he is leaving.

 

The door opens, a rifle barrel extends and the woman states she is well skilled in the use of the rifle. She lets Hex in and puts the baby to bed. Jonah shows her his empty pistol and hands it to her. He asks where her husband is and she states he is dead, she guesses. He left to look for gold after the war. She starts examining Hex's wound, asking who shot him. Jonah says it wasn't anyone special. She doesn't have any liquor to dull the pain and is not much of a surgeon so Jonah tries to guide her through it. He offers a knife and stitching supplies in his saddlebag that he brought.

 

They exchange names, she is Maisy Rae and she eventually extracts the bullet and sews Jonah up. She offers Jonah some beans on the stove and then picks the child back up. She notes that Jonah fought for the Confederacy  and mentions she lost her two brothers in that war. She also lost her parents, her mother to 'the cough' and her father to consumption. Folks don't seem to live long around her. Jonah says that the same predicament surrounds him as well.

 

Maisy asks about Jonah's family and he says he doesn't think about them much, his wife left with their boy not long ago. Maisy says that since she saved, or extended, his life he could relate a tale of his life since he appears to have many in store. Jonah says that since she asked who shot him, he will go with that one....

 

Jonah is riding through the swamp when he spies a crow or a bird of prey tangled in a string on a stick. The bird is trying to free itself. Jonah dismounts and approaches the bird when he is ambushed and falls to the ground. A young man, possibly a teenager, emerges from the brush, unties the bird, who hops onto his arm, and then approaches Hex. As the boy rolls Hex over he finds himself staring down a pistol barrel. The kind punches Jonah in the wound. Jonah gets off a shot that goes wild and the two wrestle on the ground, with five more shots being fired, none finding their mark. The kid starts gouging out Jonah's eyes and Jonah grapples for a rock and swings it against the boy's temple, killing him. 

 

Hex, groggy and bleeding, pulls himself out from under the dead boy and hears shouts of "JAMES! JAMES!" from off in the swamp. Jonah grabs his saddlebag and shoos his horse away and takes off into the swamp. Three brothers, Elliot, another wearing a bowler, and a third with an overbite, arrive upon James' corpse. They realize that they must avenge James death and they see through Jonah's attempt to distract them with the horse running off. They know they are tracking a man on foot through the swamp.

 

Jonah continues through the swamp, shedding his jacket, crawling through the roots of ageless cypress trees. Bowler and Overbite follow the trail as far as they can, noting that the blood in the water will draw gators. They ponder where Hex might be holed up, observing there are two spots, the Whillacker's place and the widow. They decide to take James home, get the dogs and return to dish out their wrath.

 

Hex surfaces from the swamp, covered in leeches. As he stops to pull them off a gator makes his move. Jonah dodges the initial attack, rassles it down and then takes off.




 

Maisy is aghast and orders Hex from the cabin instantly. Hex says he isn't going to hurt her but she says that he has put her and the baby in danger. Those three are crazy and if they think she helped him... The baby starts crying and Maisy opens the door for Jonah to leave but the brothers are standing on the porch holding a coil of rope. Maisy said she had no idea what had happened but the order her to grab her baby and come outside. They start escorting Jonah through the door and when he protests Maisy's innocence he gets a punch in the gut from Bowler. Bowler takes Overbite's rifle and orders him to drag Maisy and the brat outside. Bowler gives Hex a kick to the gut and we hear a rifle shot from the cabin. Overbite screams and Bowler and Elliot head into the cabin, stupidly ignoring Hex.

 

Maisy tells them to stay outside, Overbite is alive, but won't be if they enter. Hex rises up behind Elliot, sneaks his pistol from the holster and shoots him in the back of the head. Bowler turns and catches a slug in the eye. Jonah drops the pistol and enters the doorway, holding his side. Overbite is holding the child by the neck and Maisy has the rifle trained on him. Overbite tells Hex to leave or the child's neck will be snapped. Jonah doubts the threat, asking if Overbite is a robber and a baby killer? If the baby dies, it won't be Maisy what finishes Overbite.

 

Overbite responds that if he lets the baby go Hex will shoot him anyway. Jonah says it doesn't matter how it goes down, it isn't his kid. Maisy is astonished, after how she helped Hex. Jonah says he ain't dead and that is all that matters. Jonah reaches out for the rifle, saying he is fed up with her yapping. Meanwhile Overbite is trying to get their attention, saying he will kill the kid. Jonah and Maisy wrestle over the rifle when it suddenly goes off, killing Overbite with quick efficiency. 

 




Overbite lies dead, the baby sitting alive on his chest. Maisy stutters ".... you.... we shot my...." Jonah takes the rifle and says that when a man like that comes in the house, you don't wound him, you kill him. Maisy says the choice wasn't as simple as that. Hex observes that deep in the swamp there ain't that many people to rob, those men just liked the killing and things are making sense. A beautiful woman like Maisy left alone in the swamp is an easy target, but here she is, unharmed. 

 

Maisy tells him to leave, Jonah only cares about killing. She can see why his wife left him. Jonah tells her to cast judgement if she must. He exits, and standing in the rain he turns and tells her to bury her kin.


Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - Four
Running Total - 864 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 362 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - Shot and beaten.
Timeline - One day. After Mei Ling has left, so probably 1877
Rape Percentage -  21% (11 of 52)


Jonah has had a few run-ins in swamps and all of them were full of murderous families. At least this one didn't have a huge waterfall. This story, overall was pretty good. I enjoy Jordi's artwork and he has a knack of making people have a unique look so they are easy to identify from page to page. The interaction between Jonah and Maisy was a delight, both were wary of each other, not wanting to let their guard down and the reveal at the end where Maisy is married to Overbite was really icing on the cake. The whole issue flowed very nicely and had a good atmosphere. One small point I noticed is that Jonah showed compassion to the 'trapped' bird, leading to his ambush. Jonah has feelings for animals because they are innocent (except for bears and gators and sharks and wolves and anything else that attacks him) and has had ever since he was a kid.


Next Issue: A saloon girl, a train, and a double cross.

Wednesday, November 13, 2024

Jonah Hex V2 #51 "Divining Rod"

 Jonah Hex V2 #51 Mar '10
"Divining Rod"
Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti - story, Dick Giordano - art and cover 

Our story opens with the graveside service of Brett Singleton, his grieving widow clas in black and the local preacher giving the eulogy. He tells of Singleton founding the town and how he wielded a branch from a hazel tree to locate sources of water. singleton hoped to expand his powers to locate minerals as well. Singleton eventually found a tree that bore such a branch and used it to locate iron and then claimed he could find silver and gold. 

He made the istake of talking too loosely of this ability and some neer-do-wells ended his life for the new branch. The preacher explains that the local sheriff is not able to avenge Singleton, so the preacher called upon a man to find the killers and return the blessed branch. That man is Jonah Hex.

Jonah is mounted upon his horse on a hill overlooking the cemetery and calmley dismounts and walks his horse down the hill. Hes strides up to the widow and demands where she is supposed to meet him. She stutters a response and Hex points out she is young, beautiful, and thrirty years younger than her late husband. She asks if he is suggesting something and Hex states that he is. She slaps him across the face and then lunges at him and the townsfolks have to restrain her. 

The preacher asks why Hex said that and Hex says he is investigating, like he was hired to do. The preacher assures Hex that she had nothing to do with it, but Hex has his doubts and rides off. The preacher the tries to calm the widow Rhonna, reminding her that Hex will find the killers.

Four men are camped in the desert. Ho continues to dig a hole already six feet ddep. Stan asks if he has found anything but Ho replies in the negative. Jameson asks if Stan knows how to work the divining rod. Stan gets riled up and tells Jameson to get in the hole and relieve Ho. Stan says that if Singleton got the stick to find gold then he could too. The fourth man says maybe they need someone else might be better at it and Stan demands to know who.

Night has fallen and Jonah is in the local saloon having dinner. The preacher bursts in and is outraged that Hex is dining.Hex says he will work as he sees fit and the preacher should go get the widow and retrun with her to the saloon. The preacher says that he will not wake her after the day she has had. Jonah asks how he knows she is asleep, did he tuck her in? The preacher is astonished and Hex it will be much more unpleasant if he has to go do it. The preacher says he won’t allow her to be bothered again. Hex cocks his head and replies that he doesn’t quite know what is transpiring but he’ll figure it out. If he can garner a confession it would save a lot of time. The preacher storms out of the saloon.

Later the preacher, on horseback and wielding a torch, rides up to the widow’s house. The men from the camp are abducting her and the preacher sees them but does not intervene. 

The preacher bursts back into the saloon saying the killers have abducted the widow. Hex asks how does he know she didn’t go along quietly. The preacher explai s that they struck her, he saw it all. Jonah asks how good a look he got in the dark. It’s pretty nard to identify men that nobody in town has laid eyes on, especially in the dark with only a torch. How is he so damn sure it’s them? The preacher asks who esle it could be? They were strangers and the preacher assumed…..

Hex pulls his sidearm on the preacher. Hex tells the preacher to pay close attention. The preacher knows those men, he actually partnered with them to kill Singleton. A real man of God would have nothing to do with a divining rod. The preacher has had his eyes glued to the widow and with Singleton gone she would need a shoulder to cry on. She would eventually fall in love with her comforter. The preacher shous that Hex is a liar.

Jonah slams the table forward into the preacher’s gut, gta s his head and slams it into the tabletop. Jonah sticks his gun in the preacher’s forehead and says the sins can be confessed to him or the Lord directly. Silence falls on the saloon and everyone stands there agog. The preacher the breaks into tears saying that he loves her so much. If Hex had killed those men everything would have been perfect. The people in the saloon grab him, shouting for a rope. 

Hex tells them they can’t kill him yet. He grabs the preacher by the hair, demanding to know where they took her. The preacher says they are in the deseert where Singleton had found something. Hex tells the people to get the preacher a horse. They call for the sheriff but Hex says the widow will pass judgment and anyone with a contrary opinion will sleep next to Singleton. 

At the camp Stan demands Rhanna make the divining rod work. She laughs that they are fools. Stan slaps her down but she explains the stick is worthless, it never worked and never will. Stan says they saw it work and she explains that Singleton owned all the surrounding land. He had found water by using the geology he learned in college in Gotham City but he salted the earth iron ore. He was going to bury gold and find it in front of some big investors. Everyone would be buying the land and Singleton and Rhonna would leave before anyone wised up. 

Hex and the preacher ride up and Hex pulls a gun on Stan and the others. Stan points his pistol at Rhonna and says she stays put. Hex wants to know who had a hand in the murder. Stan says he wants to know if the preacher was in on the scam. The preacher pleads ignorance and Stan says Rhonna explained everything and since the preacher pulled them into this, what was his plan. Rhonna asks what he is talking about. The preacher tells her to mind her own business 

It suddenly dawns on her that the preacher had a hand in Singleton’s death. Hex spills the beans that Singleton was killed so the preacher could win her heart. She rushes at the preacher, the rod in her hand. With a quick lunge she buries the stick in the preacher’s eye. He falls to the ground and she straddles his chest, stabbing the rod into his other eye killing him. Stan tells Hex to stay his hand as the husband and wife were gonna scam the entire town. Hex says that ain’t his business. 

Rhonna says it is true but they didn’t wrong anyone. Hex says she wronged the preacher and she says it was because they killed her husband. Jonah says he has a problem, a woman that killed a man who killed nobody and the these other four men. Stan says he has no proof and they draw on Jonah, and the four of them die quickly by Jonah’s hand as he guns them down. 

Rhonna, kneeling in the dirt, asks if Jonah will kill her. Jonah says they had a bounty on their heads and she doesn’t. She mounts a horse and says Jonah will never see her again. Jonah replies “Never say never.”

Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - Four
Running Total - 860 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 358 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - None.
Timeline - Two days
Rape Percentage -  22% (11 of 51)

It was fantastic to see Giordano do an issue. I love his work and I think this was the last book he worked on prior to his death in March of 2010. 

The story was the kind I liked, something with lots of twists and turns. And Jonah figuring things out just by observing how folks behaved and putting the things together. Jonah being more of a detective of human nature rather than a tracker in the wild was a good change. This is one of the top notch stories of the series. Also, the mention of Gotham City was a nice foreshadowing of the All-Star Western series on the horizon. 

But the elephant in the room is the Once Again Crazy Assed Christian trope. While I despise this as lazy writing this time it was a liiiiitle more believable in that this was a man in love who stumbled trying to win a woman’s love. Rather than taking scripture out of context and becoming the personified wrath of god, we see a man with natural needs taking the wrong path to get what he wants. Granted, he could have been the sheriff, the mayor, anybody in town and the story would have worked.

Next issue: Deep into the swamps once more and family problems. 

Friday, November 01, 2024

Jonah Hex V2 #50 "The Great Silence"

 Jonah Hex V2 #50 Feb '10
"The Great Silence"
Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti - story, Darwyn Cooke - art and cover 

Wyoming, Devil's Tower in the background. Seven horsemen are riding hard and fast through a winding arroyo, they are obviously being pursued, fear on their faces. They whip their horses and shoot behind them at their pursuer. Suddenly one horse is shot in the rear flank and then, not unlike the Angel of Death, Jonah Hex leaps his horse over their heads, killing four of them. Two more continue onward and rounding the bend encounter Tallulah Black. Her sawed off shotguns belch forth death and the horses ride past, one riderless, the other a visual example of Sleepy Hollow.

Before The Fall
Night and Jonah and Tallulah exit the Sheriff's office, bounty in hand and they walk into the saloon. The place quickly empties out and Tallulah drops several coins on the bar, telling the barkeep to come back in the morning and he makes quick tracks out the door. The bounty hunting pair clink bottles, quickly disrobe and then commence to clinking something else.

Next morning finds the barkeep, a tall man (mortician?), and a woman standing in the saloon contemplating what to do with the naked form of Jonah Hex asleep on the bar. Hex awakens, the barkeep hands him his trousers and as Jonah realizes that he is at full attention, he bursts out laughing. Hex steps outside and gets dresses. A man leans back in a chair nearby, propped against a porch post. The man snickers, saying "She snuck off at dawn. Rode West. Figger ya put the spurs in that filly."

The man is quickly kicked into the street by Hex and Jonah readies to leave. Horace Green approaches Jonah with a binder of Wanted posters. He introduces himself and states that he has fifty bounties that may be of interest. Jonah asks if he is trying to get him killed. Horace states that he has heard that Jonah has killed a thousand men, not counting celestials and Mexicans, but Jonah says that number seems bloated. Horace says that his employer, Arlan Miston, has deep enough pockets to cover all the bounties and that each bounty is a man that is responsible for extortion and property damage to Miston's oil company, along with the fire that claimed Miston's son.

Hex tells Horace it will take quite some time to track down that many men. Horace replies that time is of no concern and other lawmen will possibly thin the herd. They get down to price and Horace offers $2,000 each. Hex counters with $3,000. Horace said the price is already set and Hex bids him good luck. Horace places the binder under Hex's saddle and shouts that an exception could be made if Hex brings in ten or twenty by himself.

The Hunter Unleashed
We are treated to a montage:
Jonah shooting three men in the street.
Jonah killing four men in a poker game.
Jonah using a cannon to surprise a man in a privy.
Jonah killing a man running from an encounter with a sheep.
Jonah dragging two men through a stand of cactus.
Jonah dragging a hog tied preacher from a church service.
Jonah pulling a gun on a man in a bath.
Jonah killing four men around a campfire.

The Prospect of a Fresh Start
Tallulah Black rides into Silver Springs and approaches the sheriff asking the location of the nearest dress shop. The sheriff asks what her intentions are in town and she says she has already told him. He observes she appears to have a checkered past and she says that life ain't always roses and sunshine.

The sheriff explains that the town is his to watch over and Tallulah says that she will sleep sound knowing he is on the job. He, eyeing her sidearm, replies that she appears to be capable of watching over herself. She asks if they are going to dance around or ask what he wants to know and he comes back with he wants no trouble in his town. Tallulah says that makes two of them. She states she isn't on a wanted poster, she used to be a bounty hunter and she is now looking for a dress shop. She is tired of looking over her shoulder and running away from everyone and everything and is looking for a fresh start.

He points her to Susan's Dress Shop and introduces himself as Jim Stroman. She thanks him and rides to the shop.

The Fall of Many Men
A late night meeting is being held in a barn by the light of a lantern. Mr Krauss has gathered together all of his remaining men in order to determine the best way to rid themselves of Jonah Hex. They set upon the plan of a trap, and entire town that they could lure Hex into. They pinpoint Silver Springs as the best place to make their play. It has only one sheriff, and a new town with no trees. It will take a few months for the rest of the men to arrive and a few weeks to fortify the town. The snow is flying now, but in three months, Hex will be facing twenty four guns and will meet his end.

The trees are turning color in Silver Springs and we see Tallulah, decking out in a white dress chancing upon Sheriff Stroman. Jim says he has good news, Edgrin Summerset has agreed to sell his lot near Fox Creek. Tallulah is quite touched by this kindness and he says that it is important that she and her child have a proper home, for we see that Tallulah is very very pregnant. 

As they take a stroll to the hardware they encounter Abigail who approaches Tallulah, reaching out to touch the child, stating "The Lord told me about this child". Tallulah warns that she is about to get an ass kicking and the Sheriff warns her off, telling her to get her fabrics over to Susan's place. She says a blessing on the sheriff as she leaves. Tallulah cites that Abigail is touched in the head and the sheriff shrugs it off.




Over the next few months, the leaves fall and a house is built by Jim and Tallulah and it is ready for occupancy with the first heavy snow.

The Winter of Discontent
Jonah is in a cabin with a woman, sitting near a huge fire. An old man, Eddie Runford, approaches and says last week in Yuma he heard men talking. Eddie queries if they might strike up a deal, he relates what he heard and Hex splits the bottle. Jonah puts his pistol up to Eddie's eye and says the terms are Eddie talks and Jonah won't shoot his eye out. Eddie quickly spills the information about Kraus and his men heading to Silver Springs to hole up. Jonah dons his hat and leaves, telling Eddie to take the bottle and woman, they are both paid for.        

In the hills overlooking Silver Springs, Jonah utilizes a spyglass to see Kraus and his men descend onto Silver Springs. What he does not see is a wagon coming from the opposite direction. A wagon driven by Jim Stroman and containing Tallulah in labor and Abigail riding in the back. Jim says that Abigail has done some midwifing and she can be of help but Tallulah says she doesn't want that woman touching her.

Kraus and his men arrive in town, shooting anyone and everyone they encounter. The wagon arrives at the other end of town and Jim tells Abigail to get Tallulah to safety, but Tallulah wants a gun, warning Jim that he is outgunned. The sheriff stands in the nighttime snow covered street and tells the men to leave. They respond by murdering Sheriff Jim Stroman in the blink of an eye. Tallulah is outraged but she does not see Abigail, who has been muttering about the judgement coming down upon them, reaching for a hammer in the back of the wagon. 

Tallulah turns just in time to see Abigail swing the hammer, knocking her out of the wagon. Kraus orders the remaining townsfolk to leave or be gunned down and the populace vacates the town. Abigail grabs Tallulah by the hair and drags her into Abigail's fabric store. She grabs a set of sheers and announces that she is going to remove that bastard from Tallulah's belly. Tallulah fights back, getting cut several times until finally her water breaks. Abigail, standing over her menacingly, says that she will take care of everything.

Jonah, standing in a dark alley, hears Tallulah scream. We see Abigail running off into the night, carrying a crying child as Tallulah drags her bloody body out of the shop.

Tallulah lay on the ground, radiant light pouring down all around her. A small girl gently pokes her with a stick asking "You dead?"
Tallulah replies weakly "No"
The girl says "Days like this make the cemetery man smile."
"Who are you?" asks Tallulah.
"Mind the woods. There's a bad man out there." says the girls as she fades away.

We see Jonah carrying Tallulah through the knee deep snow as she whispers "Ya scared death away.... again.."       

Later in Tallulah's cabin, she is in bed and Jonah readies to depart. She asks if he has nothing to say. She didn't know what else to do. she thought if she gave up her old life, maybe..... She tells Jonah that he knows she is right, he wouldn't have wanted it anyway and he grumbles that he was never offered that option. He says that he wasn't looking for her but he figgered they would eventually meet. This has soured their relationship, he will save the child but from here on they are done as friends and lovers. He exits and rides off.

A time later at the train depot, Jonah holds a gun on the depot master. He explains that he is looking for a woman with a stolen child. The man says that Abigail said that Tallulah was dead, killed by Kraus and his men. Jonah demands to know where the train was headed.

After a train ride of several days, Jonah disembarks into a town in the southwest. He rides up to the local jail and finds the sheriff on the porch. Jonah says that a train arrived a few days ago with a woman and a baby and he is looking for them both. The sheriff asks what for and Jonah states the child was stolen from its mother. The sheriff asks if the child is his. Jonah just glares at him. The sheriff tosses aside his smoke and tells Jonah he should come inside.

In the jail Abigail is sitting in a cell alone. Jonah asks about the child and when the sheriff starts to explain Abigail starts ranting about knowing the child was the devil's spawn and that she killed it. The sheriff says it must have happened on the train, passengers noticed the child didn't cry and Abigail was detained until the train hit town. The judge is on his way for the trial. Jonah starts to reach for his pistol and the sheriff says "I know it was yore child" and Abigail bursts out laughing.

The sheriff steps between Jonah and the cell, saying she will be hung properly according to the law. Abigail starts rattling on about knowing the devil made the child and.... well, just see for yourself...






Finally the sheriff and Jonah are in a standoff, pistols in each others face until the sheriff lowers his gun and Jonah raises his. Jonah asks "Boy or girl?"

The sheriff replies "Girl. It was a little girl." He says that he is going to do his rounds and takes him about an hour and leaves.  Abigail is on her knees in the cell, praying and Jonah says 



Spring Showers and Cemetery Flowers
The rain pours down on the night shrouded town of Silver Springs. Kraus is griping that it has been three months and there has been no sign of Jonah Hex. As Kraus and his men try to figure what Hex's next move is we see various guards outside dead at their stations. Just then a stick of dynamite comes flying through the saloon doors and Kraus and his men attempt to flee but the saloon is blown to hell and back. Kraus pulls himself up out of the mud only to see Jonah with a Gatling gun mounted in the back of a wagon. Jonah mows down each and every one of them, lights a cheroot and says    

                 

You Never Know What You'll Get
A calm peaceful night at Tallulah's cabin. From a distance we see Jonah kneel by the door. Tallulah, inside, hears a noise and quickly goes to the door. She yanks it open to see a man on horseback ride off. She looks down to find a very small coffin on her doorstep. The story closes with her on her knees, sobbing over the wooden casket and the silhouette of a man on horseback vanishing over the hilltop.

Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - We have an exact count on this one. Five at the start, Abigail, and the extra fifty, so 56.
Running Total - 856 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 354 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - None.
Timeline - Just a week or so over a year
Rape Percentage -  22% (11 of 50)

Nothing I can say can do this story justice. This is on par with The Last Bounty Hunter for depth, scope and impact. Darwyn Cooke's artwork is equaled only by Jose Luis Garcia Lopez and it blends tragedy, romance, comedy, danger and despair in such a nice tight bundle. He is one of the most cinematic artists that has ever graced a page and the world is lesser for his having lost him so early. Abigail appears to have put on weight after she kidnaps the child, but that is a minimal gripe on my part. The look on Jonah's face when the bullet bounces off the cell bar is wonderfully funny.

I can only say that if you don't own this book, you must buy it.

My only gripe with the story, and this is a long standing one with Palmiotti and Gray, is their reliance on the one note depiction of the Crazy Assed Christian. They are always ranting, misquoting scripture, and being horrible horrible people. Michael Fleisher had several stories with Christians and he ran the gamut from good to evil. I just get tired of the negative stereotype. 

There could have been another way to have Tallulah lose the child and Jonah seek revenge and I would have preferred that (or I might have accepted Abigail if Palmiotti and Gray had not already pulled from this well so many times before)

Next Issue: Dick Giordano graces the pages and sadly, once again, Crazy Assed Christians.