Jonah Hex V2 #53 "You'll Never Dance Again"

Jonah Hex V2 #53 May '10

"You'll Never Dance Again"

Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti - story, Billy Tucci - art and cover

Dance Hall Girl

Jonah is watching a dance hall show and he tells the manager he wants to speak with one of the girls after the show. She comes over to the table and Jonah says he needs a woman for an actress type job and it will pay more than the dance hall. She notices a couple of reward posters for the Hager brothers. He gives her an advance and says she doesn't have to do too much acting. She asks if she could get killed. Hex says about the same chance of getting run over by a wagon in the street. She says she'll take the job but she needs to finish another song and dance.

Day of the Big Show

Two men are holding up a station master. They tell him that when the train stops, he is supposed to tell the conductor that the train will need to stop for coal at Blue Mesa instead of the normal stop. They stay in the shadows as the train pulls up. The conductor comes up to the window and the station master does as the men directed him. When the train pulls out, they tie up the station master and they are happy they are done with their part of the plan and got paid up front. The Hager Brothers, the masterminds, aren't ones to be trusted.

The train continues up on the line and stops at the coaling station. The train guard is in the boxcar with the safe and knows that they stopped at the wrong place. He gets ready for whatever comes his way and two robbers pry open the door and shoot the guard dead. They ready the dynamite to blow the safe.

Meanwhile, the Hager Brothers (Jeb & Walt), along with the rest of the gang, have rounded up all of the passengers and are relieving them of their valuables. There is a loud BOOM as the dynamite goes off. Two other robbers are going through the cars to be sure nobody is hiding and come upon a boxcar all decked out like a funeral home. There is a casket and a grieving widow. She asks who they are and they explain they are robbing the train when one of them gets the idea to check the casket. He had heard of rich folks putting all their money in a casket to fool thieves. She begs them to leave her dead husband alone and gets slapped for her troubles.

Just then the lid opens up and Jonah hex sits up, shotgun across his lap and pistols drawn. The widow pulls off her veil and it is the showgirl from the dance hall.

Outside the Hagers hear two quick shots and run inside the train. They come upon a few of their gang and asks what is going on. They have no idea but say a couple of others went on down the train to check it out. One of the Hagers tells the man to go check it out. As he slowly walks into the last car he gets the top of his head blown clean off. Hex tells the Hagers and the other man to drop their weapons but the Hagers say he has shot both rounds and is out of shells. Hex replies that he had that shotgun made special and kills one of the Hagers. He draws his pistols and kills the other brother and the third man. 

Hex tells the showgirl to stay put and he proceeds to kill one, two, three, four, five more robbers. One surrenders and Hex ties him up. Hex helps some of the passengers load up all the bodies onto a wagon and tells them to get his and Lana's horses out of the livestock car. Lana asks  what Hex will do with his share of the reward and he tells her it's none of her business, she ain't THAT good. She is offended and sulks. The train leaves and Hex and Lana wait for the rangers to show up.

Come dawn three rangers appears and they toss Hex the bounty. One of the rangers reaches into his coat and Hex says his hand better come out empty. The ranger asks if Hex thinks he can stop all three of them. Hex replies that he can send them to where their brothers just went. Lana grabs a shovel and smashes Hex over the head from behind then says that Jethro sure took his sweet time. The other two rangers ask what is to be done with Hex since he killed Jethro's brothers. 

Jethro states that it is just as he and Lana planned. On top of that, the train is stopped about seven miles down because the rails have been blown up. Lana didn't know about the train but Jethro says that he was the mastermind for the first train robbery. Jethro and Lana start getting all lovey-dovey and Lana says her dance hall days are over. Just then Jethro's head explodes and Hex kills the other two rangers. 

Lana turns and runs. Hex touches the back of his head, sees the blood and takes aim, shooting Lana in the back.

She falls to the ground screaming that Hex crippled her. Hex stands over her telling her the next time she hits someone, better make sure he is dead. She swears she will kill Hex and he replies that she'll have a helluva time doing it from down there.

Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - Fourteen, a damn bloody story
Running Total - 878 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 376 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - Hit in the head with a shovel.
Timeline - Possibly two days.
Rape Percentage -  20% (11 of 55)

I don't normally like Tucci's artwork but there are a few panels here that really sell it and set the tone. All of the kills are bloody and graphic and quite shocking. The story was very good, I really like crosses and double crosses and double double crosses. Hex walking off into the sunrise (as opposed to the sunset) was a nice touch and I wish we would have encountered Lana again somewhere down the line.

About Jonah's 'custom' shotgun... it MIGHT have been a pump action shotgun that was first available in 1882 but that was a single barrel model. I couldn't find any such mention of a magazine loaded double barrel

Next Issue: It's the return of Victor Sono!