Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Justice League of America #198 "Once Upon a Time in the Wild, Wild West"

Justice League of America #198 Jan 1982
"Once Upon a Time in the Wild, Wild West"
Gerry Conway, story - Don Heck & Brett Breeding, art - Ross Andru & Romeo Tanghal, cover

I stumbled upon this book completely by accident. Back in 81 I was in a different town, needed something to drink and stopped at a drugstore. There on a spinner rack was this comic. I wasn't too hep on the JLA at the time, but Jonah Hex? Yup, I'll buy that.

How great/bad is this book? Well, it's a lot better than the last JLA/Hex match-up. The art isn't as good as the cover suggests but rather than try to explain the wonder that is JLA #198, I'm gonna present the whole shooting match with short comments after each scan.

SallyP, you have to admit, that is one nice Lantern butt on the cover there (not that I notice things like that.)

1878. The timeline goes downhill from here. Since Jonah disappeared in 1875 (supposedly) this takes place after he gets back. Check the Long Voyage Home in the right gutter for a nice fan-fic about how he does that.

Jonah spies some lawyers and then notices the birds in the sky


How many colors can be in the sky and there still not be a rainbow?

Judging by the burn Hal Jordan has, he must have started out as a freaking albino!!

What kinda durn fool? One that gets hit in the head more than you, Jonah. That's who.

The panel of Hex with the moon is one of the best panels in the whole book.

Amnesia, breakfast of champions.

I think the guy in red has something to do with it, ya think?

Hal Jordan, crybaby of the old west.

Butt shot number two (Ya ladies keeping track?)

Beef jerky and hardtack? What the hell happened to the soup?

Desecration, just fifty miles from Rape Innocent Women, Arizona

Cinnamon?!?!? CINNAMON?!?!? Okay, the first time Cinnamon appears is in 1898, they clearly state that she is a young woman in her twenties then, so in 1878 she would be the first infant to shoot a man's pants offa him.

sknahT, neL. I t'ndid wonk taht.

Coyote Poison, Starbucks of the Old West

Matt Savage was a would be settler? Conway wrote Scalphunter for crying out loud!! Matt Savage was a successful man and had a large acreage. (Of course, that was in the first issue written by Fleisher, but...) AAARRRGHHHH!

Ai can haz Indian Taco?

W!!?! is cougar for WTF?

Man-with-long-reach is more noble than calling him Freaky-@$$-Stretchy-Man

I'm beginning to see a pattern here.

Note to self: Dibny backwashes in canteens.

Fires 5 times, hits 3 guns, and kills 2 hookers standing nearby.

What a pane.

"Hey, Sheriff, there's a note here from some guy from the future saying that your brother is a cheat."

Another mysterious stranger. How many is that, kids?

And here the story goes right into the crapper.

Later on, 4-armed Superman will fight 6-armed Spiderman.

Now I have to get issue 197 to see if they disappear in that issue.

... Your MOM! oh, sorry.

aka my sister-in-law's mouth (not really. I kid because I love)

Kal-El, punching rockets since 1938

"This was pretty easy, I'll fly down into that green glow, because... oh, crap I just had a senior moment!"

What kinda half-life does kryptonite HAVE anyway? That crap is still deadly after 2000 years?

Okay, so the evil plan includes a huge explosion in 1907 (which is the same year Oklahoma became a state. The more you know...)

Okay, now the plan includes an anti-matter meteor from 1907

And the same thing happened in 1878 over the Grand Canyon? What the Hell? Okay, so now the plan includes an anti-matter bubble from 1878 instead of an anti-matter meteor from 1907. I can see how that is an improvement in any evil plan. I prefer my evil plans to have bubbles instead of meteors.

1981 = teh sux

So the Time Lord is using the JLA to ... do something regarding an anti-matter bubble in 1878. I guess there was too much competition from the Time-Trapper for the 1907 anti-matter meteor.

and we had to wait a month...but YOU just have to wait about a week....
cuz it takes a hella long time to scan all this!


Sea-of-Green said...

Ha! I have this issue. I must say your interpretations are spot-on, Dwayne. :-D

Hal's sunburn -- Oh, Jonah was just confused by the durn fool's California tan, that's all. At least Jonah pegged him correctly as a durn fool.

And you just CAN'T have Hal Jordan in a comic book without at least ONE good view of his butt. You just CAN'T! It's a Green Lantern illustration requirement!

SallyP said...

Oh man, I have to get this!

I also loved the "your MOM!" comment. Up to that point I had been just too mesmerized by Hal's ass shots, but at this point, I completely lost it and spit out my tea. Rather like Ralph. Eewww...Dibny backwash!

Come to think of it, Jonah was being pretty nice to Hal, all things considered. IN the current series, I think that he'd see the vultures, and simply wait around to get some free bullets or something.

Sea-of-Green said...

One thing that always bugged me about this story is that the guys just HAD to be teamed up with guys, and the gals with gals. If Hal Jordan had been found by Cinnamon instead of Jonah, this story would have been VERY different! ;-)

googum said...

Guh, I hadn't read any of this one. I do like Bat Lash's expression as he shakes Flash's hand, like he's just found the best meal ticket ever, or a total rube...

SallyP said...

That's a good point, Sea. I'm sure that Jonah would have preferred to rescue Zatanna, even IF her butt isn't as good as Hal's.

Dwayne "the canoe guy" said...

I thought the team-ups had some interesting aspects. Hal Jordan is supposed to be a man with no fear and Jonah Hex is probably the closest thing the Old West had.

Barry Allen/ Bat Lash - Well, they're both blond. Both appear to be happy-go-lucky. Both are scientists. Okay, that is a stretch but being a con-man/gambler is somewhat of a science. Ok?

Cinnamon/Zatanna - Granted, this one would have been a whole lot better if the girl/girl dynamic wasn't used. Cinnamon/Hal Jordan would have been a winner and I think Scalphunter/Zatanna would have been interesting due to Scalphunter's experience with Indian mysticism.

Ralph Dibney/Brian Savage - This one had the most to offer, but there is no way that it could have been explored in this format. Scalphunter was always an introspective quiet man while Ralph is an outgoing, self absorbed motormouth. I can see Scalphunter grabbing Ralph's hair and threatening to remove it if he doesn't shut the hell up.

Eldest said...

Ok you have to let me know when you're doing an "I'm making fun of this issue" post because with our sarcasm powers combined we are unstoppable.

That being said, having Hal and Cinnamon team up would have completely screwed up the DC universe continuity (ah who are we kidding, just make another Crisis) because there would have been about 10 little red haired mini Hals running around.

On the other hand, if DiDio had gotten his hands on this, it would have somehow turned out that Hal was then Guy's ancestor, which would have caused the known universe to explode... causing another Crisis...

Elemental Universe said...

No! No! NO!

Cinnamon debuted in 1878. She then met Hex and company in this story. Then she married the doomed Nighthawk for a year until he died in 1879, and she later died herself when her 20-year gunslinging career ended in 1898! Scalphunter died in 1899, Hex in 1904, and Bat Lash lived on until the late 1920s. said...

There was no 'previous story' showing the Time Lord capturing the heroes. The next issue explains that they did have a fight, but it all happened 'off-panel'. # 197 was the last of a three-part team-up with the Justice Society.